Dish #40 - Epic disaster?

The Dish: The AMA performance by Adam Lambert last night was a true disappointment. The live singing was sub-par, his choreographed dance routine was boring and awkward at the same time. I was waiting for it to end. Adam can do better than this. The cheering and clapping at the end of the performance (or lack thereof) proved that I'm not the only one who thought the performance was lacklustre. The performance style channelled a bit of Lady Gaga but wasn't half as interesting as her 'Bad Romance' music video. He didn't push it far enough to be completely 'out there' so it just felt like I was watching crappy dancing at a gay club. Plus, on top of everything else, the single 'For Your Entertainment' is just not very good is it? Fine. It is actually terrible. I loved Adam during his American Idol days. I still think he is very talented and has lots of potential. Perhaps it's time for Adam to hang out with more talented people than Katy Perry...? But to be completely fair, the first 25 seconds of his performance was decent, that is before all the backup dancers and flashing strobe lights showed up.

Dish #28 - Annnd I'm mean again.

The Dish: Several topics of discussion today...

Do-Re-Mi: First up, for all those who follow American Idol, remember that woman who couldn't sing, who was infamous for swearing unforgivingly at the judges AND who auditioned this year, last year AND perhaps the all the years before that AND who looked like a crackhead? Didn't think so. Alexis Cohen is her name and she is dead. Uh-huh. Next.

"Hey fattie, I don't want to be your friend...for the sake of my health!"
Apparently having fat friends make you fat or have the tendency to want to be fat or maybe it induces group-binge-eating contests - which I suppose in turn also = obesity. So if you want to remain slim and slick, stay away from the bigger crowd! Now that is discrimination. Shouldn't you try to be their friend and send out the positive message? Uh oh, am I having sympathy for wide people? Evil me, please return. Want to read the article from BBC? Click here. I say it all comes down to genetics and laziness. MMMMMMmmmm, a double cheeseburger PO-BOY please! RRRAAR, this is why you're FAT!

MJ Update: To be honest, I can't even catch up. He was addicted no he wasn't. His kids, her kids, his mom will get them, blah blah blah. Oh, the release of the autopsy report is postponed...indefinitely, accordingly to LA Times.

The quest to making desserts continues... I made a chocolate strawberry roulade yesterday. And it actually tastes great. Photos to be uploaded in subsequent post.

Random: I also got a haircut today which means I don't look like I have a dead willow hanging out of my head anymore. YAY.

Dish #19 - Tween Power!!!

The Dish: At the end of the day, we cannot underestimate the power of little American tweens. I'm pretty sure they are the reason that Adam Lambert lost American Idol. Although I remain a true Glambert fan, I do think that 'dark horse' Kris Allen deserved the title. The show is, afterall, called American Idol. Translated, it is a popularity contest. Let's face it: in real life, the weird, gay punk rocker (with more eyeliner than Amy Winehouse on most of her bad days) will never beat the charming, cute boy-next-door to being crowned the class president or homecoming king. We, as a society, are comfortable with normality and people that we can relate to. Besides, Kris is from down south (five winners in the past on AI had been from southern states) and he has been talking about his wife, his church and his parents while Adam has been putting on black eyeliner and nail polish, replicating gay iconic musicians and, um, kissing men. Go figure.

What's worse: They came up with this stupid idea and gave Kris some sort of ugly trophy that looked cheaper than the American Idol Gold awards that they gave to the worst male and female contestants of the season:

Outstanding Male = Nick 'Norman Gentle' Mitchell

Outstanding Female = Tatiana 'Crying' Del Toro

Best Attitude = Katrina 'Bikini (Now-With-Recently-Planted-Fake-New-Boobs) Girl' Darrell

Lol. They were so much fun!

Dish #15 - All the things that can go wrong.

The Dish: A little heads up: the next couple of posts will be bitchier, angrier and hopefully more me. As I once promised myself at the tender age of eight: 'Never ever let anything stop you from hating the world, Miss Tam.' Thirteen years later, here I am, upholding that very sacred promise. Besides, it feels good to have a little anger, especially in times like these.

Alright, enough babble, we move on to official business. In the files today we have...

File #BOOBS-ARE-FAKE: The rumour is false. Britney Spears is NOT pregnant. Oh thank goodness, we cannot let that crazy circus monkey breed anymore. But that does not negate the fact that she slept with and had a very good time with one of her dancers. Oh, who am I kidding? Let me correct that, ALL of her dancers. Male and female.

File #1-866-IDOLS-05: AMERICAN IDOL!!! Adam Lambert was in the bottom two last night! My brain died a little and my heart stopped beating. It was like finding out that Lindsay Lohan joined a convent and Matthew McConaughey was gay, at the same time. I know we are going through rough times and perhaps that is why we should embrace talent and people who stray off of the path of normality. I have no idea how those votes happened. Danny Dopey? Seriously, he is such a bore.

File #My-Big-Fat-Not-So-Amazing-Greek-Dinner: For those of you in Toronto, please avoid The Greek Grill on the Danforth. For a solid 40 dollars, it was the crappiest meal that Zak and I ever had. I'm sure that they have better Greek food in Malaysia or another country just as far away from Greece. Oh wait, that would also include Canada. Silly me. Zak looked like he was about to throw up when the plates arrived. I have never really had Greek food before but even I knew that pita meant a wrap with stuff in it. And if gyros is supposed to taste like plasticine mystery meat, who the hell would ever want to eat it? The rice that sided my lamb souvlaki didn't even meet Uncle Ben's standards. It was bordering on Uncle Rico's. And Uncle Rico is a fictional character. Tzatziki, from what I hear, is NOT supposed to be mayo with booger-green-looking chunks in it. We also ordered this spinach pastry (spanakopita) and it was luke warm, microwaved and stale from being left overnight and served the next day. I'm going to stop writing about it now, before I throw up from thinking about how hairy the waiter's nose was.

File #Jobless-But-Not-Homeless: I have semi began searching for possible employment. It's like even the hobo sitting at the corner of King & Dufferin don't want me competing against him for 'employment' in this economy. Am I reaching for the stars here? Well it's all about being ruthless out there in a dog-eat-dog world. I know what I have to do if the time comes. I will poison the King & Dufferin hobo and take his place.

File #Closing-Credits:

Shirley: No ranting blog will be complete if I don't complain about the weather, right?
Her Reason: Right.
S: So why is it still so damn cold out there?
HR: Um, Mother Nature hates Torontonians.
S: Why does Mother Nature hate Torontonians?
HR: Because warm weather makes the King & Dufferin hobo smell really bad.
S: But we still have a reason to live another day, right?
HR: Yes.
S: What is it?
HR: Wolverine is coming out tomorrow, duh.
S: Noooooooooooooo.
HR: What?
S: It's getting bad reviews!
HR: But do we care if Hugh Jackman takes his shirt off?
S: I guess not.

Dish #13 - Biggest Shocker!

The Dish: Welcome Susan Boyle, a simple 47-year-old church worker, who at first glance probably isn't your choice to win Britain's Got Talent. She's never been on a date, not even ever been kissed. Everyone jeered at her the moment she walked in and mocked her openly when she said her dream was to be like musical theatre star Elaine Paige. Then, to the audience's surprise, she belts out 'I Dreamed A Dream' from Les Miserables!! Just goes to show how materialistic and shallow sometimes we are today. In a mere span of 5 minutes, she has risen from a complete nobody to having her audition viewed 2,485,245 times in 72 hours on YouTube!

Click here to see the audition of Susan Boyle.

The Second Coming: After a clip of the impressive, the show also got a taste of all things creepy. Check out Gywneth the Witch!

Dish #11 - I'm a Glambert fan.

The Dish: Here I am just spreading the love, again.
Adam from American Idol 8 show last night, singing "Mad World" by Tears for Fear. It was Sing-A-Song-From-The-Year-You-Were-Born night.

[Taken off YouTube. Sorry, folks.]

Enjoy! Simon gave him a standing ovation!?!

THE LATEST ADDITION: As usual, here's the mp3 of his performance. Click here to download it. (Link/upload courtesy of http://www.rickey.org/ - Thanks!)

Mini-Dish: Fun Equations and Personal Recipes.

The Mini-Dish: Here are the ingredients to make your very own Allison Iraheta, American Idol 8 contestant.

Dish #8: It's Official...Love.

The Dish: Here I am just spreading the love. Hehe.
Adam Lambert from American Idol 8 show last night, singing "Tracks of My Tears" by Smokey Robinson. Amazing.



Enjoy! It was cool how Smokey gave him a standing-o.

THE LATEST ADDITION: I found the mp3 of his performance. Omg, it's on repeat in my iTunes. Click here to download it. (Link/upload courtesy of http://www.rickey.org/ - Thanks!)